


fire at will

by cjmasim



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Canon Compliant, Dark Academia, Established Relationship, M/M, Premeditated Prank, Revenge, Sectumsempra (Harry Potter), Sirius Black Fest 2020, Sirius Black's Prank on Severus Snape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:21:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27203749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cjmasim/pseuds/cjmasim
Summary: When Snape goes too far in getting back at James, the Marauders decide to take matters into their own hands.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 32
Collections: Sirius Black Fest 2020





	fire at will

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Sirius Black Fest 2020, based on a prompt of dark academia. I really enjoy dark academia books and films, so this was a lot of fun to write! It does deviate from dark academia media in that it has a happy ending, unless of course you choose to believe that canon events unfold after the fic ends. I think it's an original take on the infamous prank; at least, I haven't seen any other fics portray it in this way.
> 
> Warnings for some light description of blood, a near-death experience, and implied consensual underage sex (between Sirius and Remus). 
> 
> The title is from Thank You for the Venom by My Chemical Romance.
> 
> Enjoy!

It's a night like any other as of late. The four of them are in the library late into the night researching spells for the map. Sirius and James are researching one spell while Remus and Peter tackle another, though Sirius can tell that Peter is working on his Potions essay instead. He wishes they could stay there all night, but curfew forces them to head back to Gryffindor tower. 

"I swear we'd get this map done so much faster if we just took the books back with us," James complains. They'd agreed to confine their research to the library for now so as not to get behind on their actual schoolwork as OWLs draw closer. It had been Remus' idea, and as much as Sirius had wanted to argue that they'd all do just fine, he knows it's for the best. 

It had been a perfectly fine night, so of course they run into Snape. He's just standing against the wall all alone, not too far from Gryffindor Tower, probably having come from trying to get Lily Evans' attention. Sirius knows that they're friends, but with how often they seem to go through periods of Evans refusing to speak to Snape, he wonders how much longer it'll last. 

Because this is Snape, they can't simply walk by and ignore him. 

It's Sirius who starts the taunting. "Careful, Snivellus, don't trip on the grease you've dripped onto the floor."

Snape glares back at him, firing off a hex that he blocks at the last second. 

"Oi, he was just trying to look out for you," James interjects. "You should be grateful." 

Snape opens his mouth to start cursing at James, and Sirius takes the opportunity to send a stinging hex at him. James sends one of his own, too, and Peter and Remus draw their wands to be ready. Sirius notices that Remus keeps looking over his shoulder; he must be afraid of getting caught letting the duel happen rather than intervening as prefects should. He resolves to make it quick for Remus' sake, but Snape takes the upper hand before he gets the chance.

He doesn't catch the name of the curse Snape utters, but in a flash of white, James falls to the ground with a cry of pain. Blood is flowing from his chest, already beginning to pool on the floor around him. Sirius starts to panic as he realizes that this is far too much blood.

"What the fuck was that?" He yells, trying to keep his calm despite the racing of his heart. He doesn't want to give Snape the satisfaction. Remus is already down at James' side, having reacted quickly enough to summon some dittany from his bag and put it on the wound. Sirius feels a rush of affection for Remus' preparedness.

"I'll cast the countercurse before he has the chance to die," Snape drawls, unbothered, twirling his wand as if the sight of James bleeding out bores him. 

Remus tries to use Episkey, but it does nothing to stop the bleeding. With a rush of fury, Sirius realizes that Snape didn't just use some run-of-the-mill cutting curse; this is dark magic. Remus may not be a Healer, but he's long since mastered the basics.

"You can't use dark magic in the castle!" Peter yells, face red with anger. It's a moot point, Sirius thinks, considering that he already has and he'll doubtlessly do it again.

Snape rolls his eyes and mutters another spell, casting another white light at James. Sirius looks down to see that the bleeding has stopped, but the wound hasn't closed. 

"You know if you don't fully heal the wound, we'll have to take him to the hospital wing, and we're not going to cover for you," Remus says.

Snape scowls. "Fine then." With that, he walks away, and Sirius keeps his wand drawn until he's out of sight. He puts it away and rushes to James' side, where Remus and Peter are already kneeled.

"You okay, Prongs?" He asks, not sure whether James is even conscious. He's been awfully quiet ever since he fell, but he lets out a groan in response.

"We're going to take you to the hospital wing," Remus says. "Er, can you walk?"

"Of course he can't walk, Moony," Peter says, voice an octave higher than usual. Sirius hopes he doesn't faint. "His chest is practically ripped open."

"Literally ripped open," Sirius remarks. "You'll be okay, James. We can levitate you there."

"I'm fine," James mumbles, but none of them believe him. Sirius and Remus ready their wands, nodding at each other as they begin the levitation charm in sync. One of them should be enough with a strong enough spell, but it feels safer to team up. 

"I'll get in front to make sure no one walks into him," Peter volunteers. 

"I'm going to fucking kill him," James says as they begin to move. His words are a little slurred, and Sirius is pretty sure that's a bad thing. 

"Should we be pressing something on his chest? Or is that only for wounds that are actively bleeding?" Sirius asks. 

Remus takes a moment to think. "He should be alright," he decides. "I think we just need to keep him awake."

Sirius looks across at James to see that his eyes are already shutting. He snaps his fingers, but James doesn't react. 

"Hey Padfoot, did you hear what Evans said at breakfast this morning while Prongs was still in bed?" Remus asks, then mouths something at Sirius. He's not good at reading lips, but he's pretty sure Remus says _Keep his attention_. 

Sirius looks back to James to see that his eyes are open now, though he hasn't made a sound.

"Oh, that's right," he goes on, hoping James doesn't notice that he takes a few seconds too long to respond. "She said that she was glad James wasn't at breakfast because she gets so frustrated around him. He's just so… so bloody _hot_ , right, and such an amazing Quidditch player, but he doesn't spend enough time studying and yet still gets marks as high as her. It's just so unfair, and yet she can't help but like him!"

James' eyes are still open, and he makes a soft noise of interest. Remus continues.

"Right, yeah, and Marlene asked her if she'd reconsider the next time he asks her out. I've heard her ask Lily that before, but it's always been in earshot of James, so she's always said it'll never happen. This morning, though, she said she'd think about it!"

"She'll come around one day," Sirius adds. "By the sound of it, it'll be quite soon. Hell, maybe James' dashing heroism at jumping in front of a curse meant for poor little Peter will get Evans to give up the act. He'll have to get Peter to help him spin that story."

The hospital wing is within view now, and Sirius takes the opportunity to be honest. 

"We're there now, Prongs. None of that about Evans was true; we just wanted to keep you awake."

James groans again. "Fuck you both," he mutters.

Sirius and Remus laugh, in better spirits now that they're sure he'll be okay.

-

Madam Pomfrey has no shortage of questions for the boys, and she gets McGonagall involved for further questioning. They tell her the truth, and she says she and Dumbledore will handle it, but that they need to go back to their dormitory and wait until the morning to visit James. 

"I hate this," Remus complains as they walk back to the common room. "He needs support, not to be all alone in there."

"He'll be okay," Sirius says, as much as he wants to be by James' side.

"We only have History of Magic in the morning," Peter adds. "May as well skip it."

"Pomfrey won't let us do that," Sirius laughs. 

"Well, maybe she'll let Wormtail do it," Peter says. 

Remus rolls his eyes. "We'll visit him before class and see if he's awake. If he is, and Madam Pomfrey isn't about to put him back under the second we leave, you can stay as Wormtail."

"Okay, mum," Peter says, laughing.

Remus cracks a smile. "Original."

They had planned to get some schoolwork done that night, but all the time spent rehashing the incident had worn them out, so they wordlessly agree to get ready for bed. Sirius is used to going to bed without Remus there a few nights each month, but James' absence is foreign. He's been in the hospital wing plenty of times before, but he's rarely had to stay overnight, and it's by far the worst injury he's had. 

As Sirius prepares to go to sleep, he's struck by the thought that James could have died tonight. Snape had only cast the countercurse out of a desire to stay out of Azkaban, and if he hadn't, James would've bled out on the floor of the corridor while his friends watched. Sirius has never seen the spell before, not even from his family, and he wonders whether Snape invented it or learned it from another Slytherin. Before McGonagall had arrived for questioning, Madam Pomfrey had confirmed that the curse had been dark magic, the kind that's totally resistant to most healing spells. Remus' quick thinking to apply dittany should save him from scarring, but James would need to be carefully monitored for several days.

Pomfrey and McGonagall had both refused to tell Sirius exactly how badly Snape would be punished. He supposed they might not know; Slughorn would typically be in charge of that. He's known for going easy on the students he favors, and unfortunately, Snape is painfully brilliant at Potions. Unless the issue is escalated to Dumbledore, Sirius doubts Snape will get the punishment he deserves.

He's not sure what they're going to do, but he knows they will have to do something.

-

The next evening is the first time James seems genuinely alive again. He'd been awake in the morning, but still in a considerable amount of pain, and Madam Pomfrey hadn't let them stay long before shooing them away to class so she could administer some more potions. Peter had been mildly irritated at not getting to skip History of Magic, and Remus had gloated. 

When they arrive in the evening, James is sitting up in bed, so that's already a better sign. He even smiles to greet them.

"Feeling alive, are we?" Remus asks. 

"More alive than Snivellus will be next time I see him," James replies. His voice is much clearer now, and the color is starting to return to his face.

"That's the spirit," Sirius grins. "Slughorn let him off with a heavy dose of detention. He deserves worse."

James shakes his head. "Fucking Slughorn."

"We could always take matters into our own hands." Sirius is surprised that Peter is the one who suggests it. 

"I was thinking the same thing," he admits.

"I'd love to use something equally dark on him, but I feel like Minnie would be less forgiving, and I don't want to be serving detentions until I graduate," James says. 

"You don't know any dark magic, anyway," Sirius adds. 

"Not like you couldn't help me learn some," James retorts, and Sirius shrugs. He's learned his fair share of dark magic solely due to a lack of anything better to do over the summer holidays, and while he hasn't actually practiced any of it, he's sure he could help out in a pinch.

"Why use dark magic when we already have a dark creature?" It's Remus who speaks this time, and Sirius looks at him in surprise. 

"What do you mean?"

"The full moon is just two weeks away," Remus continues. "We won't let him know who Moony really is, but we could seriously scare him. Make him fear for his life as we feared for James'."

"I could've sworn I saw a white light for a minute there," James remarks. "He could've killed me. I say he deserves it."

Sirius agrees – he'd love little more than to watch Snape suffer – but he's starting to wonder if dark magic is a better idea after all. "What if he finds out it's you, Remus?"

"We'll make sure he doesn't," Remus replies. It's not enough, not really, but if he's sure, then Sirius is just going to have to trust him. 

"If only one of us leads him there, it won't be so obvious Remus is missing," Peter says. 

Sirius nods. "That's a good plan," he says. "The only issue I see is the part where he goes running to Slughorn."

"If we scare him enough, maybe he won't," James suggests. "Or if he does, then whoever tells him to find the Shack can take the detentions. We pretend it was a spur-of-the-moment decision brought on by still being pissed about him nearly murdering me and maybe we'll even get off lightly. Shit, I'll be the one to talk to him."

"No," Sirius says instantly. "You have to take it easy, remember? Besides, what if he tries something again and kills you for real? I'll talk to him."

"And what if he tries to kill you?" James counters.

Peter sighs. "Come on; it has to be only one of us. Sirius knows dark magic."

"How kind of you to volunteer, Wormtail," Remus says, rolling his eyes. "Obviously I can't do it, and I have to agree that James needs to lie low. Sirius it is."

"I'd be honored," Sirius says. "The plan is just to tell him he ought to check out the passage under the Willow, have Moony scream or howl a bit, then – what? Let him find his way out? The git is dumb enough to go charging toward the wolf, don't you think?"

"Hm, you might be right," Remus says. "Someone will have to get him out, then. Sirius?"

"I can do that," he says.

James shakes his head. "No, I don't like it. You tell him to go there and you drag him out? I don't know if that's really something you'd do. Especially not if we're going with the excuse that it was an impulsive decision. Maybe you didn't think he'd actually try to go under the tree. You thought he'd think it was a cruel joke."

Sirius thinks about it and decides that James has a point. "If he rats us out – sorry Peter – if he snitches – er, sorry James-"

"Okay, we get the idea," Remus sighs as James laughs.

"Alright, alright. If he wolfs us out," Sirius pretends not to notice Remus putting his head in his hands and sighing, "then we need to be careful not to make it look premeditated."

"You say this like we're murdering him," Peter says.

"Oh, whatever," Sirius sighs dramatically. "The point is, if I tell him to go to the Shack and you or James pulls him out, we can make it look like you're all mad at me for being so reckless. They'll never suspect that we collaborated."

"You want us to stage a fight?" James asks. "Come on, mate; we've never fought longer than a few hours."

"So we'll make it a few days," Sirius shrugs. "It'll be sort of fun, don't you think? Besides, we're making you out to be the mature one here. Maybe Evans will come around."

Remus laughs, and James glares at him.

"It's worth a shot," Peter adds. 

"Alright, I'll go after Snape. So, we're going to stage a fight regardless of whether or not Snape tells on us?" James asks. 

"No, no," Remus says. "There's no point in doing that if he keeps quiet. And I thought we agreed that we don't want you alone with Snape?"

"What if he tells someone later on, though? Then they could accuse us of planning it," Peter says. 

"If he tries to tell someone later than the day after the fact, no one's going to believe him," James says. "And I'll be fine. Snape will be scared half to death, and I'll just have to threaten him to keep him quiet."

"James-" Sirius starts, but James cuts him off with a wave of his hand.

"It's either I go after him or Peter does. Peter, how confident are you in your ability to stop Snape at exactly the right moment?"

"Er…"

"Exactly," James says with a single clap. "Come on; this is a foolproof plan." 

Sirius shrugs in halfhearted agreement. They have two more weeks to iron out the details, anyway.

"I'm all in," Remus says, and the others voice their agreement.

"So it's settled," Sirius says. "Snape is going to pay for what he did."

-

"You think we can get Peter to spend the night in the hospital wing, too?" Remus asks out of the blue. He and Sirius are in the common room working on their Charms essays while Peter plays Exploding Snap with some of the fourth years. His essay sits abandoned on the table next to them alongside the notes Remus took for James that afternoon. He's expected to be released from the hospital wing tomorrow.

Sirius laughs. "You want to spend the night alone with me so badly?"

Remus shrugs. "I feel like we're at that point in our relationship."

They've been officially together for all of three weeks, so Sirius thinks he might be moving a little fast. Not that he isn't on board. Alone time is scarce, and the only time he gets to act like he and Remus are anything more than friends is when they're alone. James and Peter know about them, of course, but they can't very well start making out on Sirius' bed while their friends watch. 

"Maybe we can just ask him to wait at least an hour?" Sirius suggests. 

Remus cringes. "I think he'll just make it awkward," he says. "He'll know what we're up to."

Sirius supposes it's fair for Peter to feel weird about his friends getting intimate in their bedroom moments before he walks into it. "Locking charm?"

"You're going to lock him out?" Remus laughs. "Eh, what the hell. He looks like he's having fun."

-

To their surprise, it's not Peter who tries to interrupt. They've just barely managed to finish when someone begins pounding on the door, and the swearing that follows is unmistakably James.

Sirius hastily pulls on a shirt and closes his bed's curtain to shield Remus as he makes his way toward the door and opens it.

"You do realize Alohomora exists, yes?"

James' eyes widen as he takes in Sirius' appearance, carefully averting his eyes up toward Sirius' face. "Is Remus in here?"

Remus resolutely does not say anything, and Sirius merely grins. 

"I'm going back to the common room, then," James nods and turns around.

"Hold on," Sirius stops him. "You won't irritate your wound by taking the stairs again, will you?"

James rolls his eyes. "If I would, Madam Pomfrey would never have let me out. Besides, Evans is down there and I need to tell someone about how I was valiantly wounded. Loudly."

He throws a bag of clothes at Sirius, presumably the one he'd meant to drop off in the dormitory. Sirius turns the door and takes care to lock it again just in case Peter comes back. 

"We going for round two, or should I actually get dressed?" Remus asks. 

"Well, we know James isn't coming back," Sirius says, and it's all the answer Remus needs.

-

They don't discuss their plans with Snape for a few more days, and it's a week after the incident when Peter brings it up again. It's a scene much like the night of the attack – the four of them in the library, bent over books as they search for spells to use on the map.

"If we'd already finished this map, we could ambush Snape anytime," Peter remarks. "Use James' cloak to spy on him, figure out that spell, and give it back to him, even."

"Maybe one day," Sirius says. He has to admit that the thought of Snape getting a taste of his own medicine is quite appealing, and even more so if they use the cloak to avoid detection.

"In the meantime, are we still clear on the actual plan?" Remus asks. "I don't suppose I'll know when exactly he's coming unless I've already transformed; then I'd be able to smell him. You all won't be able to join me, just in case he does run his mouth." Sirius feels a pang of guilt at having only just realized they'll be leaving Remus alone in the Shack for the night for the first time since they nailed the Animagus transformation.

"Well, Sirius and I already have our roles, but Peter could serve as a lookout," James suggests. "Have Wormtail stationed near the front entrance so he'll see when Snape is on his way."

"And how am I going to let you know? I can't run much faster as a rat than he can walk, and even if I could, he'd see us," Peter points out.

"The mirrors," Sirius suggests. "James and I use them over the summer to communicate from anywhere. We'll give you mine."

"Brilliant," Peter says. "So I'll let James know, and you'll know to hide, but then what about you, Sirius?"

"You act normal," Remus tells him. "It'll be suspicious if none of us have an alibi. Sirius, you stay in the common room. Play some games or work on your schoolwork, whatever. Just make sure someone sees you, and if anyone asks, I'm in the hospital wing while James is helping Peter practice the Patronus charm outside."

"Got it," Sirius replies. It's a well-constructed plan, really, and he's starting to get excited about the prospect of executing it. He almost wishes they could do more to Snape – see to it that he's well and truly hurt – but he doesn't want Remus to be the one to get blood on his hands. If anyone has to pay, he'd rather it be him, even if he knows that it's stupid and reckless to be so willing to sacrifice himself. 

If they get caught, he'll be the one being sacrificed, anyway. As long as Snape isn't hurt – and he won't be - he won't see anything worse than detention.

-

"Does anyone else feel like this is a bad idea?" James asks on the morning of the full moon.

Remus shakes his head, not saying anything. He's at breakfast, but Sirius can tell he'll be heading to the hospital wing once they're finished.

"It'll be okay," Sirius assures him, and Remus nods at him in thanks. "I'm going to _accidentally_ spill some ingredients on Snape's desk in Potions this afternoon, and when he inevitably tries to hex me after class while Peter and James are conveniently asking Slughorn about the upcoming essay, I'll tell him that he really ought to check out the secret passage underneath the Whomping Willow."

"What if he doesn't go tonight?" Peter asks.

"Then he won't be scared, but he won't tell on us either," Sirius replies.

"What if he goes on the next full moon?" Peter asks.

"We'll make a plan for that if he doesn't come tonight," James offers. "I'll be standing lookout, and if it gets to be too late, I'll put the cloak on. The more pressing question is, what if he tries that same curse on you, Sirius?"

"You two won't be held up with Slughorn too long," Sirius shrugs. "If he tries anything, I'll curse him myself. I seem to remember an excellent Black family traditional spell that makes all the recipient's teeth fall out. Those are awful to regrow, I'd imagine."

"He can handle himself," Remus adds.

Sirius grins, grabbing Remus' hand and squeezing it. "See? I have the power of true love on my side, so nothing can hurt me. I'll be fine."

James rolls his eyes, but he's smiling, so Sirius knows he feels better about their plan.

-

Snape is as predictable as ever, and as he corners Sirius outside the Potions classroom, Sirius is just glad he didn't manage to rally any troops to outnumber him. He doesn't try to slice Sirius' chest open, thankfully, but the stinging hex to his wand arm still hurts.

"You know, Snivellus, I really think you should check out the secret passage beneath the Whomping Willow," he says, gritting his teeth to bear the pain as he shakes out his arm. "There's a small knot at the base of the trunk that freezes the tree and opens it up."

"Give me one good reason to believe a single word you say," Snape sneers.

Sirius grins, hoping it makes Snape uneasy even though he knows he'll never show it. "I've heard it leads to the Shrieking Shack, though I can't say I've been there myself. There must be some awfully dark magic concentrated in that old place, if the stories of the townspeople are anything to go by."

"So you're trying to send me to a death trap? Classy," Snape says.

"I'm not forcing your hand," Sirius replies. "Just making a friendly suggestion, Snivellus."

Snape moves his wand again, sending another stinging hex at Sirius just as James and Peter emerge from the classroom. 

"Not going to try to cut my heart out of my chest again, are you, Snivellus?" James asks.

Peter raises his wand, ready to attack, and it's for the best as Sirius still isn't sure he can fully move his wand arm.

"Send Lupin my regards," he says, voice dripping with sarcasm, before turning and walking away. Peter sends a tripping hex at him, and James and Sirius laugh, but Snape gets up and storms away without doing anything else. 

"Oh, he's definitely going," Sirius says. "Got quite a stinging hex, that one. Maybe we should stop calling him a bat and start calling him a jellyfish. Or a wasp."

"You alright?" James asks.

"Yeah, it'll fade," Sirius replies. They begin to walk to their next class, and Sirius can hardly contain his excitement at the night to come. "You sure we shouldn't do more? Maybe after you save him, you can leave him tied up in the forest or something?"

James laughs. "Yeah, no, there are far too many ways that could go wrong. We're sticking to the plan."

"If we get caught, have fun in detention," Peter teases him.

"We won't get caught," James says. "I'll convince him."

-

As it turns out, they do get caught. 

Sirius is revising his Charms notes by the fireplace, sitting near some of the sixth year boys and enjoying their silent company. It's rare for him to work on an assignment without his friends right with him, but usually, the lack of distractions helps him work faster. Tonight, of course, he's preoccupied with worrying about their revenge going smoothly. The moon is starting to rise, so he hopes that if Snape was going to go for it, he's already gotten his scare and James has already gotten him out. 

He doesn't notice the portrait opening and James storming through, too engrossed in his revisions, but he does notice when James slams his hand down on Sirius' notes. 

"What the fuck, Sirius?" He sounds angry, but looking at his face, all Sirius can see is worry. 

"What?" He asks, honestly, before he realizes why James is worried. Snape must not have agreed to keep quiet. 

"Do you have any idea how dangerous that was? I know you're impulsive, but there's a difference between being impulsive and downright _reckless_. You have a brain; you just choose not to use it."

People are staring by now, so Sirius does his best to look angry. It isn't too difficult; James is convincing. 

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

James sneers, and privately, Sirius thinks that it's a surprisingly good impression of Snape. "Your little act with Snape today," he says, then lowers his voice so that their audience can't hear his next words. "Do you have any idea what could have happened to Remus if I didn't step in and save his greasy ass?" He takes the edge out of his voice, as if remembering that he doesn't have to be cruel when no one else can hear him. "Sorry – I mean, Snape did figure out that it's Remus, though. I tried to tell him it wasn't, but he wouldn't believe me."

Sirius doesn't have to fake the panic that sets in. "God. Fuck. He isn't going to tell anyone, is he? I didn't think he'd-"

"Yeah, that's exactly what the problem is, _Black_ ," James says, louder now. "You didn't think. You never do." 

"Fuck you," Sirius says, getting up and trying to grab his notes. James' hand is still on top of them, keeping him from going anywhere.

"You know McGonagall is coming to collect us," James says, again too low for anyone else to hear it. "He told Slughorn. I'm sorry for – well, you know, it was the plan."

"I know," Sirius whispers before raising his voice again. "Some friend you are."

"I know you Blacks aren't capable of making rational decisions, but you're the one who fucked up here," James says. 

Sirius flinches. He knows they're just acting, but it's starting to feel a little too real. "Let me go," he says, quieter. James shakes his head, keeping his hand on the papers. "Fine then," Sirius says, leaving the notes behind as he heads toward the stairs to the dormitories, keeping his head down and trying not to look at anyone. He doesn't make it far before the portrait opens again to reveal McGonagall.

"Mr. Black, Mr. Potter," she says, and Sirius goes over to her without a word. He goes over the story once again in his mind to prepare himself for the lying to come. It's not much different than reality, and maybe that's why James' words get to him more than they should. 

-

He gets two months of detention every weeknight, effective starting the next day, which seems a little excessive considering that it's more than Snape got for nearly killing James. On the bright side, McGonagall promised that Dumbledore would talk to Snape and make sure that he doesn't go around spreading Remus' secret. 

When he makes it back to the dormitory, only Peter is there, James having snuck back out to spend time with Moony as Prongs. James wastes no time in talking to him the next morning, though, before they head out to breakfast. Peter is already gone.

"I'm really sorry about the things I said yesterday," he says. "I went too far."

Sirius shrugs. "It was just acting; I get it. Maybe the fake fighting was a bad idea, but at least it stopped the rest of you from getting in trouble."

"About that-"

"James, you stuck to the plan. It's okay," Sirius says. 

"Okay," James accepts it. "Maybe this whole plan was a bad idea. I just wanted to get back at him, you know? I was more scared by that whole incident than I wanted to admit. I mean, I could've died."

"No, you're right; I get why you wanted to do it," Sirius says. "Was Snivellus thoroughly scared, at least?"

James laughs at the memory, and it's enough for Sirius to know that it was worth it. "Oh yeah. He almost shat himself."

Sirius laughs, too. "Perfect. As long as Remus is okay, then I'd say it was a fine plan."

"You don't think Snape will tell anyone, do you?" James asks.

Sirius tells him what McGonagall said. "Besides," he adds, "the way she phrased it, she made it sound like Dumbledore has dirt on Snape."

"You think he'd blackmail a student?"

Sirius shrugs. "Maybe one who uses dark magic on a fairly regular basis. My family all hate him, so he must be doing something right."

"Fair enough," James nods. "As glad as I am that Snivellus was scared, though…"

"Yeah," Sirius sighs. "I swear I'll kill him if he says a word."

"I'm with you," James says. "This time, we'll go down together. We can be cellmates in Azkaban."

Sirius laughs despite himself. "You're not funny," he lies.

James grins. "No, I'm bloody hilarious."

-

Sirius sits alone at breakfast that morning, and they keep it up for a few more days to maintain the façade of fighting. It's not especially fun, but at least he makes a lot of progress in his OWL revisions. 

"Are we going to stage a make-up, or are we just going to suddenly start sitting with you again?" Peter asks one night in the privacy of their dormitory. Sirius has already been here since his detention ended, under the guise of ignoring his so-called former friends, and the others had waited about an hour before joining them so that it'd be late enough to pretend they're just going to bed. Sirius is sure they're all tired of the amount of planning required for a fake feud.

"I say we just pretend we're making up right now and start acting normal in the morning," Remus suggests, ever the voice of reason. 

Sirius nods. "I agree; it'd be rather suspicious if we had a whole apology session where people can hear us anyway, don't you think?"

James laughs. "Merlin, can you imagine the reactions, though?"

"Maybe next time we stage a fake fight," Sirius says, even though he gets the feeling they're never going to do that again. "If there is a next time, though, I'm not the one being excluded again. We'll take turns."

"I volunteer," Remus jumps in. "In fact, I think we should try to even out the detentions among the rest of us. I'll go next in the hopes that we can have some detentions together."

"Oh, those poor professors," James says, making them all laugh. 

"Don't get too intimate with Filch's buckets," Peter adds. 

Sirius knows that there's no chance the professors will actually put him and Remus in detention together. Besides, he thinks it's only fair for Remus to skip out on landing himself in detentions since he already has the extra duty of being a prefect to worry about. He does appreciate the thought, though, and says as much. 

"There are better ways to spend time with you, anyway," Remus says. 

"We'll still have to keep getting back at Snivellus, of course," James adds. 

"Oh, no question," Sirius agrees. "He deserves far worse still. We'll never let that bastard rest."

"Hear, hear," Peter cheers. 

"We can figure that out later," Sirius says. "We have plenty of time."

And maybe they'll figure out what spell Snape used to hurt James, or maybe they'll find a much worse one to use on him, and Snape will deserve every bit of it and more, but privately, Sirius thinks that the most important thing is that they all have each other's back.


End file.
